Making sure that you are getting enough sleep.Eating a well-rounded, nutritious diet.Self-care comes in many forms, but it boils down to honoring your physical and emotional needs. This can be such a vulnerable time, and itвЂ™s essential that you take care of yourself through it. With that in mind, there are a few universal tips worth considering. Everyone is different, and each person will recover differently. When moving on after a divorce, keep in mind that there is not вЂњa one size fits allвЂќ approach for healing. You can find new fulfillment and meaning in your life. That said, it is possible to heal and move on. You may be experiencing many intense emotions, and it can be challenging to comb through them. Read more in her book Landscapes of the Heart: The working world of a sex and relationship therapist' (2016) ВЈ12.99.After going through a divorce, the idea of moving on may seem frightening, frustrating, or downright impossible. Juliet Grayson is a UKCP registered psychotherapist specialising in sex and relationships. Always exercise kindness and understanding for each other as you find your various ways through the fog of separation. When the anger comes, as indeed it will, it's important to be careful where it's directed. Anyone going through a divorce is bound to experience a kind of grief cycle. The trick will be to do so without resentment for what has been lost. Individually we will all come to terms with these changes and move on with our lives. Whether it is a souvenir of a holidays in Europe, photographs of favourite places, or your 'I love Venice' T-shirt, once destroyed, it can all send a powerful message of separation to the deepest part of the psyche, thus cauterising the personal aspect of a wider social wound. Such a ritual might include breaking a plate or tearing up a cloth, burning or burying something small and personal that symbolised the relationship that has been lost. If we can acknowledge and then recognise these stages that will start to heal the internal relationship between those who voted to Leave and those who wish to Remain.ДЄnother way to heal ourselves is to perform small rituals that reinforce the message of separation, and allow us appropriately to express the anger, grief and shame of the parting. Accepting the new reality, reinstalling hope, and seeing that life goes on, even after the end of this relationship. Depression is a necessary step, and although it might feel like the end of the world, that is simply a part of the process of adjusting. 'This can't be true!'Дuring the inevitable angry stage things can become unpleasant, and that's when it might get ugly, as blame and shame gets passed around. Many who go through divorce experience the denial stage. These stages are not sequential, and each one may be visited several times. These include shock and denial, anger, bargaining, depression and eventual acceptance. The Grief CycleДЄt the end of any relationship there are various stages of adjustment to loss, noted by Elizabeth Kubler Ross, and called the Grief Cycle. In her next therapy session she said, 'If he'd made those changes when we were together, we could have made it work.' The shock of her leaving had woken him up, and he'd become the very man she'd wanted all along. Alice noticed he was really attentive with his new partner. Within six months of their relationship ending, Tom had lost two stone, given up the dope, and was in a new partnership. Both partners felt that they had lost a baby.ДЄnother client, Alice, left Tom because he was overweight, smoked too much weed and spent hours alone, listening to his music. But seeing his pain, she couldn't carry it through, and found herself saying, 'Let's stay together and have a baby!' However, that was very short lived, and only three weeks later she realised that she really wanted to leave, and this time the separation was final. Many years ago I worked with a client, Jenny, who wanted to tell her boyfriend, Mick, 'It's over'. 'What did I do wrong? What more could I have done?' Some, having decided to leave, change their mind a few hours later. During a separation, there is a lot of soul-searching.

How to cope with divorce